Is self-doubt one word or two?
What about self-loathing? Two words or one?
Today was rough. The details don't matter. I am not a unique human; I am just human. And so I imagine this as part of my humanness and imagine that if you reading this, you are also human, and that you have experienced a day or two or a thousand like this in your own lifetime thus far.
I will spare the details and just say that things went from bad to worse to terrible, relatively.
And then, a silver lining: I have people around me who will not allow me to wallow too long in that space. For instance, Charlie.
Action helps. I took Margo for a walk. We always do a similar dumb nightly walk: we go by Insomnia, the cookie store; we go by SLODOCO, the donut shop; we go past Kona's and Charlie's Place; we walk by the taco place, which tonight, $2 taco night, was packed. The bar next door was also packed, kids (well, young adults) spilling out into the parking lot. Some girls came over to pet Margo, and then some guys. And I felt better, sharing my dog on our dumb walk with kind, enthusiastic, seemingly homesick for their pets, buzzed college students.
Another silver living about being down in the dumps.
I remember reading, probably in some Tim Ferris book of interview, that deep disappointment plus vision are integral ingredients for effecting change. Something like that.
Anyway, tomorrow I'm going to surf and write, Imshallah. Today was not a bust, but I hit lows I hadn't experienced in a in a long time. I have a daily goal of writing here about something every day, so here is today.
And even this, fulfilling this small, silly goal for myself, has already made the day better.
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